Delight

A verse was on my mind yesterday.   "Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart."   From time to time yesterday this feeling of dull ache would come up.  It wasn't despair, just a longing.  Anyway, this verse went through my head.

Later, I remembered a friend had given me a book to read.  I have been so busy that I had no time to look at it.  As I read through the pages there again was "Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart."  written in bold at the beginning of a chapter.  It really stood out to me (especially since I had just been thinking about it) and I said a quick prayer that God would help me to delight in him.

After that, I still felt a tugging by the Holy Spirit to spend more time in the Word.  I have been rationalizing lately.  I read someone's thoughts about the Lord nearly everyday and the verses to go with it.  I think about God's will ALL THE TIME, and I am always offering a prayer up about something.  That is time with God!  Still, I felt the Holy Spirit tugging so I headed for my "waiting and hoping" chair and I opened my Bible.  I had no idea where to even start so I prayed for guidance and came across a couple passages that although interesting, did not seem fitting for anything right now.

"Lord!  I am just sad!  I know I need to praise you anyway.  I know you are great.  Help me here."  Then quietly in my spirit I hear Read Psalms.  Psalms, that's perfect.  David was always praising and crying out.  I reach into my Bible to turn a bunch of pages at once and head in general towards Psalms.  As I flip the first hunk of pages the first thing I see jumping off the page is this, "Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4

I did my laugh cry thing I do when God is so clear and so active with me.  I do love the Lord.  The verse right before it says, "Dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture."  God has given me a safe place to not only dwell in, but also to enjoy.  I need to focus more on growing in him and less on growing my family.  I know he put that dream there and he will fulfill it in His time.  I don't want to take His dream for me and turn it into impatience, anger, and despair.

A quick story:
On a trip to Disney World within an hour of arrival, my son, who was only 4 at the time, was done with the ride.    He wanted OUT of the car.  I chuckled when he said, "Let's just go back home!"  I knew we were so close.  As his impatience got worse I began to regret ever offering him the treat of Disney World.   In his anger he was turning my opportunity to bless him into his opportunity to sin against me!  Now, he was 4, and as a 4 year old some of this was expected, but I realized something. I do the same thing, but I do it to God!  So on this ride to the place the Lord is taking me I want to Delight in Him, not demand he speed up or let me out of the car!