As I watch the leaves blossom into full color over the pond I am amazed at the beauty of creation. Even in death and in the process of dying there can be beauty. One by one each leaf will fall and soon the trees will appear bare and lifeless, but for a brief moment the world is a riot of beautiful colors.
I wait for this season of my life to change. I want to know already what God is doing and where he is leading my family. The patience required of me is something I am not good at walking out. I know what I need to do. I need to stop the struggle. The endless questioning and looking for signs of the next season of my life. It is a time to embrace this current season.
My life is filled with the beauty of the miraculous right now! My husband is parenting 5 children with grace and humor. I am loving, praying over, and teaching these children I felt so called to bring into my family. My oldest children are developing in ways I never knew possible as they live out the realities of self-sacrifice and empathy for others. The boys... oh the boys! They are loving, and laughing, learning, and growing. They are healthy, well-fed, and filled with a security that we will always be here. They do not doubt they are loved by this family, they proudly announce they are awesome, to anyone who will listen.
Today, the boys left for a visit and again my heart constricted in my chest. Again the tears came quietly down my cheeks. Again, I sought His comfort and reassurance. This season is so hard, but this season is beautiful too.
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