In the last few days I had decided not to jump everytime the phone rang. I had decided not to bother carrying my cell phone with me every second. I had decided not to live as if myt life might change at any moment. It was just too much to constantly wonder.
You can imagine my surprise when I realized I never took my phone off the charger this morning. I went to retrieve it and found that a caseworker had called 2 hours ago. "Don't get excited. Don't get excited!" I told myself. Most likely it was another form of paperwork I had forgotten or a class we could attend. The voicemail let me know otherwise. A sibling group of 3 young boys needs a place to go.
I am in this strange place of being so excited and being so nervous at the same time. First of all these boys aren't free for adoption. Their case is complicated and I do not know what the outcome may be. Secondly we are going from a family of 4 to a family of 7!
As crazy as it may seem to some of you that is the part I am most excited about. I am happy to fill our Excursion and our home up. I don't just want to live with more than we need because its comfortable. I want to fill the space up and God is letting me do that.
Another point of nervousness is just the wondering what the dynamic will be like. I am wondering how the children will adjust to one another and to us. I am wondering how we will adjust to them... and on another level I am just so sad for them and for their bio parents and for this crazy sin-filled world we live in.
God be praised! He is going to use me to be a blessing to more children!
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